Also, ales and lagers, as a group, cannot be determined by color. End of story.

Memo to the universe: if it is fermented and uses hops, it is beer. It does not matter if the base is rye, wheat, or raspberries, it. Is. Beer.

Framboise? Beer. Beer is not just crappy pale lagers, no matter how "natural."

Also, if you do not know what a specialty beer is, do not pretend you do. If it is manufactured by a major distributor and was not a small label purchased by said distributor within the past ten years, it is not a specialty beer.

You do not look smart for talking about this "amazing" specialty beer you found, which you finally remember as Shock Top. Shock Top is a good Belgian White, but it is not special. It is brewed and bottled by fucking Michelob. You do not look like you really know anything about beer. You just look silly.

You make my kitten-shaped, beer-loving soul cry.