Truth That Goes Crunch

1.

Friday Night: I am going to suck, because you have come home with a 100° F fever and are now bedridden and hacking.
Me: Thanks, and fuck you.
Cat: *observes me prone in the bed* I want to be petted. Here, I will shove the furriest part of my body into your snotty nose and face.
Me: Feline, you are going to regret this in a couple minutes.
Minutes: We pass.
Me: *starts hacking and wheezing directly into feline fur*
Cat: *shocked and horrified, shoots off bed* Why, I never!
Me: Yeah, well I warned you.
Process: I repeat myself two more times. Cat begins to understand my workings the third time.

2.

Tuesday Morning: Normally, I would suck because you're still kind of sick and wheezy, but I am also the start of a snow day, which is pretty awesome.
Me: *burrows deeper into covers, ignores world*
Cat: *saunters over* I request to be petted.
My Arm: I'm going to reluctantly snake out from under the covers because my owner inadvisably thinks you're kind of cute, half-heartedly rub you several times, then hide back under the covers.
Cat: Such petting will not suffice--I know when I am being placated. I shall flop on your face until I receive my due.
Me: Feline, we have been over--
Cat: I shall flop with the utmost dignity. *promptly flops down, misjudges available flopping space, and slides off bed*
Cat: Clearly, this means you are not worthy to pet me. *saunters off*

3.

Tuesday Afternoon: Eh, I'm alright. There is hot cocoa and a blanket on the couch.
Me: *reads book for class*
Cat: You have the kneading blanket. I require it to knead on. Additionally, I require you to pay attention to me. *cautiously mounts my cramped stomach-to-knees space and begins kneading*
Me: This is unusual! You never want to sit on my lap. Is my snowbound existence softening your resistance? Does the kitty want pettings? Yes, the kitty does. (Ed. Note - Avery does in fact speak to The Feline in this manner. There may be a mildly embarrassing unintentional audio recording of him doing so.)
Cat: I require no more attention. *leaves stomach-to-knee area*
Me: Aww, why did the kitty leave?
Biological Processes: We announce it might be a good time to take a shit.
Me: *passes cat food bowl on the way to the bathroom, sees it is empty* Oh.
Cat: *walks past* Yeah, genius.

4.

Wednesday Morning: Snow Day #2! And you have been productive!
Me: Fuck, I need to put my bills in the mail. And take out the trash. Fuck. It's cold outside. *beings dressing to leave apartment* Feline, it's cold outside! And I have to put my boots on! (Ed. Note - The Boots wish it be made known that being both steel-toed and waterproof, they are actually pretty cool.)
Cat: Yeah, and? *returns to licking self*
Me: But. Cold. 10° F!
Cat: *sleeping*
Me: ...appreciate the vote of confidence there.

However, I have not yet crafted clothing for The Feline, so I'll consider this an accomplishment.

So, I have inherited a monkeycat.

Said cat is Sora, originally Friend's cat. However, Friend's Roommate, who is a neat freak, put down an ultimatum: Sora or me. Due to financial reasons, he had to choose Roommate, and I had to take in Sora.

Her meeting with Cat went about as can be expected on the first day--fluffed tails all around. By this morning, however, they could largely share the couch in peace.

Sora is adorable, but I call her a monkeycat (alternately squirrelcat) for a reason. If it is climbable (including me), she will climb it--with or without claws. If she can try to get into it, she will. I've already accidentally locked her into a closet once.

And to the final point, she has made me into one of those cat owners.

arionhunter: I have become one of those cat people
petra: Oh?
arionhunter: Who treats their cats like children
petra: ohhh. yes. Those people.
arionhunter: I just told new!cat Sora, "In this household, we give spankings when you've been bad." in a parent-voice
petra: Oh. dear.

( The first meeting. )

( This morning. )

For the amusement of northerners: the kind of snow that shuts down a Southern town.

Heard Neil Gaiman read Thursday. He was excellent, and totally worth putting up with the bar's poor beer selection. He said he his contract excluded signings, but this proved not to be entirely true: I and a group of friends stuck around a half-hour after the reading and found him at the side of the building, signing books. Sadly, though, he looks rather out of it in our group shot.

Annnnd....from the depths of V-Day clearance comes Twilight "Forbidden Fruits" Sweethearts. They come with a variety of creepy Twilight-trademarked phrases, but that's by no means the best part.

They sparkle. The hearts, filled with minuscule sugar crystals, sparkle. Cat was unimpressed.

(That's okay, because she was being adorable earlier.)

Given I'm ignoring the fact I had my first "I am gibbering and losing motor control" panic attack in a year and a half last night, I feel it is time for me + kittens.

( Kittens! )

Last Weekend, in movies:
- Cutie Honey
- Bullitt
- Citizen Kane
- Xanada

( This weekend, in photos. )

Ways to tell if I will bookmark something in Delicious:
- Is it about food? More specifically, is it about beer?
- Does it involve globalization?
- Does it involve Asia?
- Does it involve comics or animation (in China)?

Then I've probably bookmarked it. (Sadly, there are no Chinese comics/animation involving the globalization of beer in Asia. But one can hope!)

I do not promise coherency. This is maybe four posts, compiled into one big "I need to sleep but I need to post" post. I promise post-finals I will scan in Mr. T and the T Force!

arionhunter: *just bought a book on the making of camp* I cannot wait for finals to be over
dingsi: *hug* stressful?
arionhunter: Yeah, and irritating because I have books! And I want to read them now.
dingsi: i know that feeling. it's like getting chocolate for easter and being expected to NOT eat it right away
arionhunter: Exactly!
I have a book on rhetoric and argumentation that takes on street preachers!
I know that's not sexy to everyone, but I'd hit it with a ten-foot pole.
dingsi: hah! I can see why

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Things comics have given us that are questionable - the series "Lynch Mob." (man in the middle with the glowy fist is Lynch). The main character may or may not be a man of color whose codename is "Lynch." I do not have the time to take scans, but in the first issue Lynch's skintone considerably is darker than the white people he stands next to. The writer never clarifies Lynch's ethnicity, as they're all too busy fighting a hot anthropomorphized female computer AI in a bikini.

Then again, this imprint also gave comics "Smiley the Psychotic Button," whose first issue ends with Smiley realizing he, as a button, has no penis so he can't have dream-sex with Lady Death.

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My first cat macro starring Cat.

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( Summer reading list, mainly for personal reference. )

Sooo...what happens when your internet is out for a night and you have no access to lolcats?

( You take pictures of your cat. )